starbucks roundup, part uno

i spend a whole lot of time in starbuckes. so i had this idea for a new gimmick. and this is it. the starbucks roundup.

at first you might think "that is not a very clever name. there is not even any alliteration or pun or humor or originality or... etc etc" to which i say "i get it i get it, and i considered 'starbuck spotlight' or even 'starbuXmarksthespot' which is pretty clever but reminds me of the logo for Xanadu! On Broadway! but at the end of the day, i have always been partial to the idea of roundups, and the visual image of lassoing the herd of starbucks is both humorous and metaphoric.

so what i am going to do is write a little blurb about notable starbuX in the manhattan area. i will do this whenever i visit a new starbucks and remember to write about it, so you can be assured that there is absolutely no schedule and a very good chance that this could be the only entry ever. who says college grads arent dependable?

today i will highlight the three starbucks from whence my most recent iced venti sugar free vanilla americano with soy milk have come. PLEASE TRY TO CONTAIN YOUR EXCITEMENT!

1. west broadway and fourth.
this joint is a long skinny rectangle that is pretty unremarkable as far as starbucks go. however, it sits on the corner of that trendy maze that is tribeca and soho and whatever the heck else is down there, so take your coffee to go and then wander through the streets exclaiming, "this place looks so cute!" and "we have to come back here!" every three seconds. also, remember: WEST broadway, not regular broadway. if you forget and dont have a cell phone and are meeting someone there, you too may have to use a payphone to correct the address. this recently happened to one of my dear friends. A PAYPHONE!

2. 39th and 8th.
this is the starbucks grotto. as in it's enormous, not as in there are playboy bunnies in waterfalls (sorry). people. it has a LOFT. and a really cool study table with its own private balcony and hanging lamps that would be prime real estate in any college library. there are couches. and a balcony thing where you can spy on everyone ordering their drinks below you. their airconditionning is also really efficient. (read: brrrrr.) also: bankers on coffee breaks. galore.

3. the old standby! 114th and broadway.
the columbia starbucks. also rather unremarkable, save four things, which i will delineate with bullets (fancy!) so as not to confuse the list already begun:

• the seats in the window where i am sitting RIGHT NOW!


• they are filming a movie in front of me. not really cool, but the reason this post sounds like it was written by an ADHD sloth without a spell check (it was)


• you can steal columbia's wireless from said window seat and it's usually quite dependable.


• whenever someone opens the right-side door, paul mccartney's interpretation of blue steel comes frighteningly close to my face. if you snag this seat, you also can pretend that sir mccartney is hitting on you. (why doesnt anyone use the left side door? this is a trend, and weird.)

THANKS FOR JOINING US SEE YOU NEXT TIME ON... THE STARBUCKS ROUNDUP!

Sunday Smiles

What do you do with a Sunday night? It's part of the weekend, so you want to have some fun, but if you have too much fun, your case-of-the-Mondays might be fatal.
In the past year, I have discovered a Sunday night habit that is a near-perfect solution: ASSCAT. Those of you who are unfamiliar with the show likely think that a strange title. Allow me to explain:
ASSCAT is a show at the UCB theatre. It is improvisational comedy. It performs every Sunday at 7:30 and 9:30pm. Amazing component #1-- The best of the best perform (cast members from SNL & 30 Rock are regulars). Amazing component #2-- The 9:30 show is free. The catch: If you want the free tickets, you have to wait in line.
I like the show enough that I have sat through my fair share of freezing sunday nights to catch it. But in the summer, when there's nothing else to do and it's beautiful outside... why not?
This week TK accompanied me. We arrived at the theater at around 7:30, bought a 6-pack and proceeded to play games. Botticelli has become a favorite of my Graight associates. I mentioned the game in a previous post, noting how bad I was at it. But this week I surprised even myself with my lack of talent. Really Artesia? You can't get Julius Caesar? That's just plain sad. Despite my perpetual failure at said game, I had a great time waiting in line. It was fun, relaxing, and involved 3.5 beers-- a nice amount for a Sunday.
And then there was the show. Amy Poehler and Horatio Sans opened things up, so already I knew it was going to be a good show. The guess monologist was a guy I had never heard of, but was really funny and really cute...and gay? Not sure. TK and I tried to figure it out throughout the course of the show but didn't come to a definitive conclusion. The show, as usual, was very very funny-- I particularly enjoyed a recurring bit in which middle-schoolers watched the Miracle of Life video, repeatedly fainting.
As someone who used to do comedy, I am very picky about what I like. I've seen few stand-up comedians in my life who I think are worth the 2 drink minimum. I've seen improv so uncomfortably bad that I had to leave. Yet, ASSCAT rarely disappoints.
After the show, TK and I walked home and enjoyed the summer night. Full of laughs and some coors light, I was ready to embrace the week...or at least the 2 days of week I had until the 4th.



UCB Theater:
307 W 26th StNew York, NY10001
Phone: (212) 366-9176 . C, E at 23rd.

ASSCAT:
Sunday @ 7:30-- $8 (still cheaper than a movie and no waiting in line for this show)
Sunday @ 9:30-- Freeeeeee! But be willing to wait 2-3 hours

http://www.ucbtheatre.com/schedule/

you're invited to my tarty

i have a penchant for baked goods and puns, so when i was in dublin i made my travel companion march all over temple bar looking for a little cafe called the queen of tarts. my big fat THEENTIRETYOFEUROPEINONEBOOKHOWCONVENIENT travel guide told me to, and while i was in europe i was really into highlighting everything that my travel guide told me to do and actually did, so now if you borrow my book (i really dont know why you would, seeing as how it's the 2006 edition, but if you do, for some reason, borrow it) you can see that i went almost everywhere in paris that it told me to, and i also went to all the places that served word play with their pastries.

so queen of tarts was very cute and i think i had an apple scone and perhaps a cappuccino. and when i was in soho visiting "lindsay" at her job today, and she told me to go to a little place around the corner called once upon a tart, i said great! another whimsically punny bakery! in the city!

















it took me a minute to realize that once upon a tart is not actually a pun at all, and that while i would be willing to be queen of a court of tarts (pies, not sluts), i hope i never find myself actually upon a tart, because it would get squished and afterward i most likely would not be able to eat it.

that being said, however, my mozzarella sandwich with artichoke and roast tomatoes was a tasty little lunchie (even though I WANTED THE ROAST TURKEY WITH BRIE AND CRANBERRIES why were they out why were they out!) and there were lots of scones with flavors that sounded intriguing and i will most definitely go back to try and desert-y tarts that looked like i would like them if i were a dessert person. i am not.

however, "artesia," who shares my penchant for all things savory, so please pass the salt, proposed a difficult question to me the other day: would you rather everything be too sweet or too salty? this is very hard for me to stomach, but i think i have to go with too sweet, because i would rather eat a spoonful of sugar than a spoonful of salt. it does, after all, help the medicine go down.

what what what would YOU do?